Even a King gotta poo sometimes

Its hard for some to admit, but the fact remains that even your favorite rapper isn't perfect. In fact, every MC on earth has some skeletons in their closet that they would like to unrecord.  Let's take a look at the worst song released by some of the world's best rappers:

Random thoughts of the day: Lil Wayne's release and Game's irrelevance

Why are people at Cash Money and Young Money acting like Lil Wayne is on vacation right now? They are just piling work up for him to do as soon as he gets back. Drake said he and Wayne will be doing a collaborative album, then Mack Maine committed Wayne to starting from scratch on The Carter IV, and now Baby announced another Like Father Like Son album will be dropping next year (btdubb: are T-Wayne, I Can't Feel My Face, or the Wayne and Lloyd album still happening?). Dude is just getting out of jail! A lot has changed in the last year. Give this man a minute to readjust. He is probably just trying to chill in his Snuggie, throw on that new Susan Boyle, and catch up on some Lost. And, a word of advice: don't show him the iPad right away. He won't be able to cope.

BTDubb: Kid Cudi is a smacker

Feel free to listen to Kid Cudi hella smack his lips at the end of Kanye's "G.O.O.D. Friday" - we cued it up for ya.  Don't worry, it doesn't ruin the song like that first time you heard Big Pun gasp for life after every bar, or that annoying high pitched sound on the "(Once Again) It's On" beat.  Its just funny.  Our word of advice to the lonely stoner: hit that bottle of water before you jump in the booth next time my dude.

Pardon me while I re-release your joint into the Recycling Bin

The best part of waking up is not a Rick Ross re-released album to bump.

There must be a lot of members of the Ross family and hella people on the Miami police force. Nothing else can legitimately explain how Black Wooly Willy over here sold 400,000 copies of his yearly coaster, Teflon Don. Now, as a big “fuck you” to the (unrelated) people that bought it, he has announced that he will be re-releasing the album with new bonus tracks. Though it is hard to feel sympathy for people who still buy Ross CDs in this day and age, it is the principle of the matter that irks us.

First of all, this is a terrible business idea. The reason this was a viable option for other (better) artists is that they have die-hard fan bases that might actually shell out the cash for another copy of an album they already own. Rick Ross doesn’t have this.  Have you ever met a Rick Ross fanatic? Anyone who was going to buy this album already did. Anyone who wasn’t going to buy this album either hasn't and never will listen to it, or illegally downloaded it (and probably deleted it soon afterward). If the Avatar re-release bombed, how could there be any hope for Teflon Don?

Rick Ross would be an excellent Executive Producer. First, he looks strong enough to dangle a gangly white rapper from a high rise building. Second, his albums sell because of everyone else involved. It’s like a compilation album with good producers, good guest artists, and one weak rapper swizzing up every track (Quick SAT review: Rick Ross is to his own album what Hittman is to Dre's 2001). Furthermore, where does this man get off adding bonus tracks? The album was only 11 tracks long to begin with! You’re not dropping Thriller or Illmatic here, Ricky. Just throw those tracks on from the get-go.

The real issue here, however, is not that Rick Ross sucks and has no reason to be re-releasing mediocre albums. Rather, it is that this re-releasing trend has gathered far too much momentum in the industry as of late. Record labels (and artists that want to keep their record deals) are always looking for a way to bump up their sales numbers (part of the reason double discs were so popular was that they are counted twice by Soundscan, so gold sales = platinum plaques). In any business, it’s understandable to want to maximize profits, but you can’t do it by swindling your customers. That’s exactly what is happening when artists drop their albums and then drop a special edition a few months later. They could have given us both at the same time and let us choose, but essential they are saying “fuck you, pay me… twice”. What’s worse, most of the time, the newly included songs are those that were cut from the original version because they weren’t good enough. You want us to buy another copy of your album to hear some shitty songs that didn’t make the first cut? Fuck you, give me my money back!

Sometimes, however, they are tracks that were cut for lack of space, rather than quality, or that just didn’t fit with the sound or flow of the album. Further, sometimes they just weren’t finished in time to make the album. In these cases, perhaps it’s not about sales numbers, but just wanting to get the music out to the fans. Fine. Then leak them! Not only will you not piss off your listeners, but they will really appreciate it. Fans love it when artists leak their own music. If you made enough on your album to even be considering a re-release, then you made enough to take a loss on a couple tracks. But what if it’s more than a couple tracks? Those production costs are going to start adding up. Fine. Re-release the album with a bonus disc, but then release the bonus disc on its own as well! Lady Gaga and Usher did it! That way, you get that sales bump from people who hadn’t purchased the album yet and the real fans that ran out to get the album as soon as it dropped the first time don’t feel cheated when they are re-released with new music.

In summation, good artists need to stop cheating their fans out of their hard earned money just to boost sales figures, and Rick Ross needs to stop pretending to be a good artist. Also, he can feel free to just truffle shuffle his fat ass away from the mic altogether.

The 6th Best Hip-Hop Album EVER MADE

In our last installment, Ethan celebrated Kanye's blockbuster debut and Scott explained his admiration for Clipse's dark classic.  Here, we each share of our picks for the 6th best hip-hop album ever made.


Ethan's #6 Pick:  The Notorious B.I.G. - Life After Death (1997)

I love storytelling raps. Slick Rick’s “Children’s Story” is one of the best hip-hop records of all time. My favorite Eminem songs are still joints like “Stan” and “Kim”. Jay-Z’s “Meet the Parents” is more a complex epic poem, similar to Homer’s Odyssey, than a mere song. When these songs succeed they can be incredible, but making them work is easier said than done. As with all storytelling, bad style and flat characters can make even the best story songs fall flat (BDP’s “Love’s Gonna Get’cha (Material Love)” (KRS-One sucks!), Common’s “Testify”). This difficulty, coupled with the fact that (my opinion aside) storytelling raps as a whole are not that popular, causes many artists to avoid these songs in favor of safer, easier, and more marketable product. Not Biggie! His second album, Life After Death, not only features some of the best singles hip-hop has ever heard, but it also includes an abundance of narrative raps from one of hip-hop’s greatest storytellers.

The dramatic storytelling starts off immediately, as the Intro (which has a hint of theatricality itself) is followed up by “Somebody’s Gotta Die”, an engrossing tale complete with one of the greatest twist endings in rap history (perhaps second only to “Stan”). The narrations continue throughout the two discs, on gripping songs like “Niggas Bleed”, “I Got a Story To Tell”, and “Miss U”. Other tracks seem more traditional at first glance, but also incorporate the style in the rhymes. Songs like “My Downfall”, “Sky’s The Limit”, “You’re Nobody (Til Somebody Kills You)”, and “Fuck You Tonight” (“…we be lucky if we find a spot next to your sister, damn I really miss the/way she used to rub my back when I hit that…”) are significantly enhanced by Biggie’s use of storytelling.

The genius of Biggie lies in the fact that these songs are captivating, even if you don’t follow the story. The sex and street crime-themed lyrics hold up against the best non-story songs with similar subject matter. The beats are also strong in their own right, so you can vibe to the songs without listening to the lyrics. But the instrumentals complement the lyrics so well that they actually draw the audience in and promote a closer listen. Even those that might normally skip story tracks will let these songs play, because, above all else, they are just good songs.

Furthermore, as great as Biggie was at creating these absorbing fictions, he could also tear up the charts and spit fire with the best of them. While other artists spend their entire career trying to create a single like “Hypnotize”, “Mo Money Mo Problems”, or “Going Back to Cali”, Biggie made all three on a single album. And while other artists are rapping about the drug game and having beef, Biggie is defining them! Other artists love the dough? Not as much as Big. He even keeps pace with (perhaps even surpasses) Bone Thugs-N-Harmony at their own game on the astonishing standout (and my favorite song) “Notorious Thugs”. Biggie holds nothing back on this album, going harder and delving deeper into the music than most artists ever do.

Ready To Die is cool, but Life After Death is Biggie’s legacy. It was released during an era in which rappers were dropping double albums like they were going out of style (causing them to do just that). It didn’t seem to matter whether artists had enough good music to fill two discs (or one for that matter), and the fact is, most didn’t. Yet, Biggie didn’t do it because it was popular. He did it because he was at the top of his game and the great music was just spilling out. Life After Death is the rare example of what a double album should be: two full discs worth of strong music with no fluff or filler. It’s hard enough to make a classic CD. One this album, Biggie did it twice.

Scott's #6 Pick:  Mos Def - Black on Both Sides (1999)

Somewhere in Cuba, Pac must have been smiling when he first heard Black On Both Sides.  This album was truly a rose that grew from the concrete known as 1999. 

Rewind back to the end of that year.  Hip-hop was stuck in a post-Puffy, shiny suit hangover that was even worse than that era itself - as evidenced by Puffy's own dismal follow-up.  Pac and Big were long gone.  Jay-Z and Nas, hip-hop's newly anointed kings, released arguably the worst records of their respective careers.  To everybody's chagrin, Master P came out of his retirement to drop an album with a very original title.  Oh, and rap's biggest single was a Will Smith and Sisqo collaboration.  Needless to say, things were bad.

Somehow, out of this abyss came Mos Def's amazing Black on Both Sides, an album both old and new.  Mos' debut is old in the sense that it is entrenched in classic hip-hop linchpins like black righteousness, social awareness, and, of course, great production and emceeing.   However, despite its seeming familiarity, Black on Both Sides also manages to sound completely fresh and new through live instrumentation and Mos' own ingenuity and vast skill set.  Upon your first listen, it sounds like something you've heard a thousand times though nothing before has ever sounded like it - the mark of a true classic.

Mos Def sounds so natural on the mic that it is easy to take his ability for granted.  This man can rap his ass off, and songs throughout the album flaunt his excellence.   The Diamond D produced "Hip-Hop" finds Mos speaking on the state of rap, spitting, "The industry is just a better built cell-block/ A long way from the shell-tops and the bells the L rocked".  He touches on nearly everything, from rapping about water on "New World Water", to using numbers to drop science on the Primo-banger "Mathematics".  Perhaps the most poignant of all his lyrics are found on "Mr. Nigga", which describes the veiled white racism present in America at the end of 20th century.

Mos can also be a wonderful, soulful vocalist when he isn't trying to be a rock 'n roll front man.  Whereas his follow-up was bogged down by misguided crooning, Mos merely sprinkles his singing throughout Black on Both Sides to great results.  Album stand-out "Umi Says" finds the rapper at his most inspirational, singing of freedom and unity for blacks.  "Climb" is a spacey, intimate duet with longtime Tribe collaborator Vinia Mojica.  And choruses throughout the album, such as on "Love" and "Habitat", benefit from his singing vocals.

The production on Black on Both Sides is lush and varied.  From traditional boom-bap provided by the aforementioned Diamond and Premier, to the organic, Native Tougne-esque "Got", to the pre-Blueprint sped up soul of Ayatollah's "Ms. Fat Booty" and "Know That", Mos is provided excellent beats to rock over.  However, it is the live instrumentation present on the vast majority of the album that make it sound home-grown and original.

A manifestation of both hip-hop's past and Mos himself, Black on Both Sides gets everything right.  This is the album to give someone who has never heard rap before and wants to know what all the fuss is about.


DOWNLOAD LIFE AFTER DEATH HERE:  http://www.megaupload.com/?d=o8anficp
DOWNLOAD BLACK ON BOTH SIDES HERE:  http://www.mediafire.com/?vnanmyzlmwa

Preemptive wack song of the day: whatever MC Hammer releases in response to Jay-Z

Please, Hammer don't hurt yourself...

MC Hammer isn't happy with Jay-Z's verse on Kanye West's latest G.O.O.D. Friday release, "So Appalled". Now, Hammer is planning to strike back.

First of all, Hammer, don't be "so appalled" by people poking a little fun at you going broke. You spent several lifetimes worth of money in a few years. That shit is funny! You can't be mad at them, just yourself.

Second, you are gonna try to go at Jay-Z? You haven't been relevant in rap since the early 90s and even then you were hardly considered a lyricist. And your best insult is to call him "hellboy" (btdubb, those movies are SICK)? This is probably not gonna go well for you, man.

But, hey, what have you got to lose?

BTDubb: Detox update... that shit is never coming out

We recently took a look at Dr. Dre's Holy Grail-like Detox album (see below), and mentioned that the leaked songs from the albums were disappointing. Well, Dre just announced that none of these songs, "Under Pressure" included, will be making the final cut... sooooo, the song that he was ready to release as the first single, meaning it was one of the best songs on the album, is no longer good enough to make the final product. Sounds kinda familiar... like he's scrapping this version as well... like this album isn't coming out any time soon.

The 7th Best Hip-Hop Album EVER MADE

In our last installment, Ethan paid tribute to Dr. Dre's modern-day classic and Scott gave love to Goodie Mob's soulful debut.  Here, we each share of our picks for the 7th best hip-hop album ever made.


Ethan's #7 Pick: Kanye West - The College Dropout (2004)

Since the release of Jay-Z’s classic 2001 album The Blueprint , I had been listening to Kanye West’s beats and freestyles, imagining what his own album might sound like when it came out. When some of his songs started hitting the streets, including “My Way”, “The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly” (which ended up on Consequence’s debut 3 years later) and “Home” (which is still one of my favorite Kanye songs, and far superior to the Graduation remake with Chris Martin), I got excited, thinking these solid tracks were a sampling of the forthcoming album. When The College Dropout finally hit shelves in 2004, however, Kanye shattered all my expectations. By taking the soul-sample sound that he helped make famous to new heights and embracing a style of rapping that was unheard of in commercial hip-hop of the day, on his first album Mr. West created a classic of his own.

While Kanye is a commendable rapper, his real genius (and success) stems from his work on the other side of the sound booth glass. Having produced smash singles for Jay-Z (“H to the Izzo”), Talib Kweli (“Get By”), Ludacris (“Stand Up”), and even Alicia Keys (“You Don’t Know My Name”), Kanye had raised the bar, and expectations for this album, exceptionally high. He does not disappoint, though, pushing his celebrated style to new limits by selecting unique samples, mixing in keyboard and synthesized melodies and live instrumentation (Miri Ben-Ari is AMAZING), demonstrating a fresh take on the soul-sample beats that had flooded hip-hop since The Blueprint. Standout examples include “All Falls Down” (but the original version with Lauryn Hill is sooooo much better), “Spaceship”, “Slow Jamz”, and “Two Words”. Even the entirely original beats that don’t incorporate samples (“The New Workout Plan”, “Get Em High”), while among the weaker tracks of this album, are impressive compared to other songs of the day (The breakdown at the end of “The New Workout Plan” is fantastic).

This album is also notable because of Mr. West’s rhymes, which, while not lyrically incredible, are substantively very innovative. His themes range from comical to conscious, sometimes in a single verse (“Golly, more of that bullshit ice rap, I got to apologize to Mos and Kweli/But is it cool to rap about gold if I told the world I copped it from Ghana and Mali?”), from the material to the spiritual, and from rhyming about guns to rhyming about not rhyming about guns (“one waist, two gats”, “I woke up early this mornin' with a new state of mind/A creative way to rhyme without usin' knives and guns”). While seemingly contradictory, these clashing topics came from a simple honesty that was a refreshing and welcome change from a lot of the commercial hip-hop at that time. With so much recent praise being paid to Drake’s “everyday, middle-class guy” persona and introspective, deeply personal lyrics, it seems to have been almost forgotten that Kanye popularized the style five year earlier.

The guest appearances on this album are heavy and somewhat inconsistent (Jay-Z delivers two incredible verses on the stupefyingly good “Never Let Me Down”, while Common spits a mind-numbing and out of place 16 on “Get Em High” and Ludacris is just kind of there on “Breathe In, Breathe Out”), but are enjoyable on the whole. Similarly, the skits and interludes range from breathtaking (“Graduation Day”, I LOVE songs with talk box) to nauseating and pointless (“Workout Plan”) and could have easily been cut down (come on, two DeRay skits in a row?!?). These minor weaknesses, however, do very little to detract from this otherwise stellar effort.

Like my esteemed colleague (see Scott’s number 10 pick), I too love Kanye West’s entire catalogue (including the ever controversial 808s and Heartbreaks). I admire the fact that Kanye is not content with just doing what works, dramatically changing his sound from one album to the next. Where Scott finds Mr. West’s best work later on, a result of this growth, I think it comes from the foundation. The College Dropout is a presentation of the sound that made Kanye famous, the sound that he perfected, and what’s more, it’s a collection of some of the best examples of that sound (a result of ‘Ye “…saving all the good beats for himself”). Where he has gone from this starting point is remarkable, but like traveling around the world, nothing compares to home.

Scott's #7 Pick:  Clipse - Hell Hath No Fury (2006)

Over the years, drug dealer stories in rap have become so glorified or clichéd that listeners have given exceedingly less credence to them – believability, or “realness”, has become the main barometer in evaluating this type of music.

Clipse is one of the preeminent pushers of this so-called “crack rap”.  In 2006, the Virginia duo released Hell Hath No Fury, an album that delves deep into the crevasses of the drug world.  While filled with all of the glamorous perks that come with dealing drugs, every success is framed within a prevailing backdrop of regret, uncertainty and paranoia.  It is their willingness to unearth the tolls of hustling that gives their songs depth and separates it from its peers.  Hell Hath No Fury transcends any “realness” evaluation, as Pusha T and Malice tell a story so compelling that authenticity becomes irrelevant.  This is the quintessential crack rap album.

The Clipse have masterfully cast themselves in the larger than life world of drugs, with Pusha T at one point spitting “Paradise in reaches, home next to beaches/ Hair pressed, blowin' in the wind, shit 'bout long as Jesus”.  Cars, women, and money are no strangers here.  Like any good drug tale, Clipse take advantage of the excesses provided to them from drug slanging.  “Dirty Money” is dedicated solely to the topic of splurging drug money on women.  On the atypically upbeat “Ain’t Cha”, Pusha T acts as a villain, rapping “Epitaph reading how much damage you could take/ While I'm on the boat with ya bitch, salmon on the plate/ I know why you liked her, the head it was great”.  Ruthless.  And the duo isn’t afraid to engage in any violence that follows suit, particularly on the chilling “Chinese New Year”.  This is the stuff of movies, and most albums stop here.

But from the beginning, Clipse make it known that every excess comes at a cost.  On the organ-laced intro “We Got It For Cheap”, Malice expresses his distaste for hustling: “And to little brother Terrence who I love dearly so, If ever I had millions never would you sell blow, never”.  On “Momma I’m So Sorry”, the duo conveys regret for damage done to their family, with Malice saying that he can’t even look his wife in the eye.  “Keys Open Doors” makes it clear that crack dealing is a necessity, not a choice.  Even on the seemingly boastful “Ride Around Shining”, the preface “while I can afford it” shows uncertainty in sustaining such an exuberant lifestyle.  By the time album closer “Nightmares” rolls around, which describes their paranoia of dying or going to jail, Pusha and Malice's affliction becomes fully realized.

Accentuating their story is a dark backdrop provided by the Neptune’s off-kilter and sparse production.  The extravagant soul samples typically used by drug rappers have been replaced by pulsating accordions, stovetop ignition hi-hats, demonic chimes and burrowing space-age synths.  These inventive and odd beats make every song sound unsettling, furthering the notion that Clipse are illustrating, not celebrating, their lifestyle.

Hell Hath No Fury lets the listener decide whether or not money, cars and women are worth the consequences.  Both decisions can reasonably be made from listening, and that is what makes the album genius.


DOWNLOAD COLLEGE DROPOUT HERE:  http://www.mediafire.com/?incuymmmmkj
DOWNLOAD HELL HATH NO FURY HERE:  http://www.mediafire.com/?04e3nzy53tx

Old school hip-hop: I love you, just not in that way...

Ok, you’re planning a trip overseas and you are going to fly. Which would you prefer a seat on, a Boeing-757 or that Wright Brother’s jump-off?

We received a criticism that our list of the top 10 hip-hop album ever made will likely not include any albums released prior to 1992. Well (SPOILER ALERT), you’re right, they won’t. Why should they? Early hip-hop albums, artists, and music in general weren’t as good as they have since become. We respect old school hip-hop and the artists that pioneered the sound, but with time comes experience and growth. It is understandable, and undeniable, that the music would get better as it develops.

The beats have progressed from bare loops and scratches to more complex compositions of creatively chopped samples, synthesized sounds, and even full orchestration. The very best of the old school beats may still be better than the worst of today’s offerings, but overall they have improved immensely. 

The lyrics have also advanced from the plain, nursery-rhyme-esque raps of old to the intricate, multisyllabic rhyme schemes and beat-riding delivery that we hear today. Even Rakim, the architect of the new style of flow and an innovator in his time, today sounds bland and a little boring because his monotonous voice doesn’t pack the punch of more animated artists like 2Pac, Biggie, or Eminem.

Also, was there hearing-loss epidemic going on in the late 1980’s and early 1990’s?  Or were studio headphones just super loud back then?  We ask because it seems like every rapper was uncontrollably yelling on their songs.  Many ancient rappers like Run DMC, Beastie Boys and Chuck D spent their entire careers howling.  Atleast by the mid-90's, rappers eventually learned to shush it.  The aforementioned Biggie was hooting and hollering on his oldest songs.  Remember RZA on 36 Chambers?  Yikes!  Screaming makes their songs unlistenable.  More than flow, it could be argued that Rakim pioneered the use of an inside voice.

Honestly, if we were to include albums prior to 1992, what could possibly make the list? Criminal Minded? KRS-One is the epitome of the nursery-rhyme emcees and quite frankly a really, really terrible rapper. It Takes A Nation of Millions? Strictly Business? Same thing. Cool music, bad rapping. The only ones that come close in our opinion are The Low End Theory and Great Adventures of Slick Rick. But even with Tribe’s smooth sound and Slick Rick’s exceptional delivery and storytelling ability, the albums can’t quite make it all the way up the list. And as good as Low End is, it was wildly outshined by Tribe’s next (post-92) release, Midnight Marauders.

To all the people who couldn’t disagree with us more, that’s fine. You’re entitled to your opinion, as wrong as it may be. But our guess is that you are remembering yourself loving the music more than remembering the music itself. We all have a soft spot in our hearts for the music we grew up to, but at some point you have to look back and think “hmm, was Ma$e really that good?” No. No, he wasn’t.

The 8th Best Hip-Hop Album EVER MADE

In our last installment, Ethan commended Little Brother's exceptional debut while Scott celebrated Wu-Tang Clan's sprawling double-disc classic.  Here, we each share of our picks for the 8th best hip-hop album ever made.


Ethan's #8 Pick: Dr. Dre - 2001 (1999)

Dr. Dre is a revolutionary. Not a political or social revolutionary (at least not since leaving N.W.A.), but a musical revolutionary. He creates entirely new styles (or perhaps steals from entirely new producers) for each of his albums and transforms the soundscape of music  for years to come. This, however, has proven to be both a gift and a curse for Mr. Young, as it is likely the reason for the huge intervals between albums and the multiple scrapings of the previous versions of his still unreleased third album, Detox. In the case of Dre’s second album, 2001, however, the result was glorious.

2001 (which, despite The Game claiming otherwise, was actually released in 1999) is a huge departure from Dre’s classic debut, The Chronic. Where the earlier album was a gritty, sample-heavy street record, 2001 is a much more sophisticated composition. The samples are largely discarded in favor of stripped-down keyboard and synthesizer arranged melodies. Not everything from the first album is abandoned, however. Dre’s signature drums remain crisp and the basslines are still phat as all hell. With help from Mel-Man, Scott Storch, Mike Elizondo, Lord Finesse, and probably a lot of other un-credited producers, Dre created an almost flawless collection of stirring instrumentals that still impress over ten years later.

To compliment the groundbreaking new sound the album has an extensive supporting cast of rappers, singers, comedians, and even porn stars. Most noteworthy is the second half of Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg’s 1999 reunion after Snoop’s No Limit Top Dogg album earlier that year. Although the end product isn’t the return to The Chronic hoped for by fans (Snoop’s fault, not Dre’s), songs like “Fuck You”, “The Next Episode”, and “Bitch Niggaz” still prove that Snoop is at his best over Dre’s instrumentals.  The best of the bunch, however,  is “Still D.R.E.” (probably because Snoop is confined to the chorus). With keys from Scott Storch, lyrics penned by Jay-Z, and perhaps the deepest line Snoop Dogg has ever muttered (“I’m still fuckin’ with you. Still waters run deep!”), this song is also arguably the best song on the album.

Other guests include Kurupt and Nate Dogg reprising their roles from The Chronic (way to keep Daz off this one, Dre), up-and-comers like Devin the Dude and Xzibit (I realize both had careers before this, but let’s be honest, they weren’t much of careers until they had Dre’s fingerprints on them), the slightly out of place Mary J. Blige, a TON of random, unknown rappers, and of course Eminem.  While Dr. Dre is genius behind this album, 2001 wouldn’t have been possible without Em. Before discovering Slim Shady, Dre was largely considered washed up, remembered as the man who produced the super-flop Firm album and kept rolling up his damn window in the “Been There, Done That” video. Thankfully, Eminem snapped Dre out of this lack-of-funk to do 2001, ghostwrote some of the best rhymes Dre has ever spit (“The Watcher”, “Forgot About Dre”), and personally delivered some of the most memorable verses on the album (e.g. “Slim Shady, hotter than a set of twin babies in a Mercedes Benz with the windows up til the temp goes up to the mid eighties”).

Some say Dr. Dre is a perfectionist. He must’ve gotten this reputation after 2001, however, as there is plenty to criticize about this album. Most obvious are the abundant guest features which, while understandable as production is and should always be Dre’s first priority, are overextended here. The most obvious example is “Some L.A. Niggaz”, which is just chalk full of awful rappers (and Xzibit). I would be insulted if I was M.C. Ren and this is the song Dre put me on (but then I again I would be insulted if I was M.C. Ren).The worst featuring artist, though, is Hittman (Aftermath’s previous flagship artist, providing just one more reason that Dre needs to thank his lucky stars daily for Eminem), whose verses pollute a mind-boggling seven songs on this masterpiece.  Also, the skits add little aside from showcasing Dre beats that otherwise wouldn’t have been good enough to make the album and tracks like “Murder Ink” and “Ackrite” sound an awful lot like filler. These critiques are especially regrettable considering the album’s 22 tracks. It could’ve easily been cut down and the final product would’ve been much better for it.

While not perfect, 2001 is a tour de force which found Dr. Dre once again elevating the west coast to prominence and himself to the status of rap royalty. Over a decade later, a familiar picture seems to be developing. The west coast is quiet in mainstream hip-hop, and Dre is once again attracting doubters after years of delivering inconsistent and lackluster beats. It looks like a perfect time for a comeback. A perfect time for DETOX! Start holding your breath… now.

Scott's #8 Pick:  Goodie Mob - Soul Food (1995)

“Sometimes I don’t even know how I’m gon eat, bout 20 dollars away from bein’ on the street”.  Welcome to Atlanta.  

OutKast brought it to the suburbs, Lil Jon brought it to the clubs, and T.I. brought it to, well, jail.  But no one actually took listeners inside the ATL quite like Goodie Mob did on their 1995 debut, Soul Food.  

The quartet’s tale of struggle and spirituality quash the notion that their hometown is merely filled with a thousand night clubs, dudes in wigs, and gold pimp cups.  In fact, at times it sounds like an album only intended for those already submerged within the depths of the city, handing other artists the duty of romanticizing Atlanta for out-of-towners.

There are no glossy singles or recognizable samples, and the album is practically devoid of any misogyny or gangster clichés.  Everything on Soul Food is deeply rooted in reality.  This becomes apparent from the opening gospel “Free”, with Cee-Lo singing “some wonder why I'd rather die than to continue living this way”.  From there, Goodie Mob dives head-first into a variety of heavy topics.  “Thought Process” describes the day-to-day financial struggle to survive in the ghetto, “Live at the O.M.N.I.” examines the plight of black prisoners and the corrupt powers behind it, and “Sesame Street” tells harrowing stories of growing up in the inner city.  

Even Goodie themselves sound real.  T-Mo, Khujo and Big Gipp aren’t going to dazzle anyone with metaphors or multi-syllabic rhymes.  Despite this, it is precisely their workman-like and no frills approach on the mic that lends weight to the hard life that they rap about.  These guys sound fresh out of the struggle, not the underground mixtape circuit, which is what makes their stories so believable.  Conversely, it is also exactly why, a few years later, their unfortunate attempt at crossing-over failed.

But Goodie Mob isn’t without a star.  A then-unknown Cee-lo Green shines incredibly bright throughout the album.  From soulfully crooning about his mother at the end of the superb “Guess Who”, to a jaw-dropping 2-minute freestyle at the end of “Goodie Bag”, to a spoken word street sermon at the end of “Fighting”, Cee-lo proves to be multi-talented and profound.  Despite later abandoning rap to find success singing hipster-approved hits, Cee-lo never sounded more in his element, or better, than he does on Soul Food.

The other star on the album isn’t a member of Goodie Mob.  Soul Food is Organized Noize’s production masterpiece.  The production trio, taking time off from working with OutKast and TLC, decide to ditch their popular smoothed out groves for dark, soul-filled beats that provide the perfect backdrop for Goodie’s stark narration.

Tales of struggle tend to be taxing.  But at its core, Soul Food is inspirational.  By pinning down the reality of urban life rather than misrepresenting it, Goodie identifies not only what is really going on but also how to cope and ultimately free oneself from it.  By the time the album reaches the redemptive closer "The Day After", it becomes apparent that Goodie Mob is ultimately stronger and better off because of what they've been through.  It is this underlying inspiration that makes Soul Food, though deeply rooted in Atlanta and deeply rooted in struggle, such a universal and remarkable album.

DOWNLOAD 2001 HERE:  http://www.megaupload.com/?d=GE24NQZY

DOWNLOAD SOUL FOOD HERE:  http://www.mediafire.com/?2jv0nwmlnsw

Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and Detox

In honor of Dr. Dre’s second album, 2001, being chosen as Ethan 8^th best hip-hop album ever, we examine the long and winding (and possibly unending) road to the release of his follow-up, Detox.

All indications are that Dr. Dre is looking outside of hip-hop for inspiration in completing his next album.  One can only assume that the film A.I., Guns N' Roses' "Chinese Democracy" and Brian Wilson's "SMiLE" have each had a profound influence on the super-producer during the making of Detox, which has faced a troubled path for over 8 years.  However, Dre still has a few more years (or decades) to go if he wants Detox to equal the greatness (or lateness) of its predecessors.

Announced in 2002, the album was originally intended to be a concept album which told the story of an assassin named Detox. Besides being just a terrible idea, this was a tremendously ambitious a goal for a guy who can’t even write raps. Concept albums in general are rarely good. Add to that the inconsistency and disjointedness that would likely come from several ghostwriters and it becomes clear that it was for the best that this version was scrapped.

Subsequent iterations of the album were rumored to also have been abandoned and the instrumentals used for albums such as 50 Cent’s Get Rich or Die Trying (SPOILER ALERT: wait a couple days for a full look at this album) and The Game’s The Documentary (which didn’t stop Dre from exclaiming “Look out for Detox” on this album). These are the versions of Detox we would’ve loved to hear! These are both amazing albums, save for the guys rapping on them. If it was Dr. Dre and his standard slew of featured artists instead, either of these could have been the classic album worthy of his name.

Which brings us to 2010 and Dre announcing that Detox would come out this year, and that he’s super serious this time. We, however, remain unconvinced that it will, or even should, be released anytime soon.  At Fenway Park, Dre took a break from his relentless work on the album to announce that the first single, “Under Pressure”, would be released in a couple weeks.  That was in April.  While we are all still waiting for the official release of this song, an unfinished version leaked a while back, and it kind of sucked.

Even the reference tracks for “Topless” and “Shit Popped Off” that leaked last year, while better, were somewhat disappointing.  However, these tracks and "O.G.'s Theme" make it clear that Dre intends to keep Detox close to his West Coast roots, enlisting Ludacris and T.I. to write for him.  And just a cursory look at the rest of the beats Dre has been making as of late show that he is not exactly at the top of his game. If that’s what Detox is shaping up like, maybe Dre needs to take some more time and make it right. It’s not like anyone will be shocked when it’s delayed again.

The 9th Best Hip-Hop Album EVER MADE

In our last installment, Ethan praised Snoop Doggy Dogg's g-funk laced classic and Scott extolled the virtues of an underappreciated Kanye disc.  Here, we each share of our picks for the 9th best hip-hop album ever made.


Ethan's #9 Pick:  Little Brother – The Listening (2003)

I love Little Brother. Phonte’s rhymes are lyrical, clever, and sincere, 9th Wonder’s beats are simple, yet so rich and soulful, and Rapper Big Pooh is in the group as well. Every Little album is amazing (I don’t count Leftback as an album, but as an anthology of whack that was better left on the cutting room floor). Even their mixtapes sound better than most rappers’ (and even some of their own) albums. Like so many other artists, though, their best offering is still their debut, The Listening.

When considering Little Brother’s catalogue, I find it best to disregard Big Pooh entirely. Just pretend he isn’t there. With that in mind, this album starts off a bit slow, with the “Morning” intro being followed by a song with no verses on it (Groupie, Pt. 2). The album picks up quickly, however, and hits one of its many peaks early on with “Speed”.  This laid-back instrumental is countered with a stressed-out examination of the everyday hustle and hubbub. It’s the kind of song that reminds you of your own plight, but then makes you want to just say eff it and cheeeill.

At this point, the album has gathered its steam and is rolling along nicely. On “The Yo-Yo” Phonte spits hotness and then promptly makes you feel silly for bobbing your head by pointing out that it his lyrics didn’t even rhyme. Another peak is reached with “Shorty on the Lookout”, where apparently the guys woke up and called each other to find out what they were doing, and then figured that would make a pretty good song. In fact, it made a great song! “So Fabulous” is a jazzy tribute to old school hip-hop, complete with impressions of the artists they’re honoring. 9th Wonder shines especially bright on “The Way You Do It”, with a string sample that just makes my knees weak every time I hear it. “Away From Me” is Phonte doing what he does best, spitting the kind of heartbreakingly honest lyrics that are so rare in hip-hop. And why is “Home” just so damn tranquil! They could’ve let that ride out for another six or seven minutes.

The Listening is best summed up, unsurprisingly, by the title track. The beat is cool and soothing, with eerie echoes and an ill Pete Rock homage, over which Phonte and Big Pooh convey their love for meaningful music and their disappointment in listeners for not necessarily sharing that love. The best part of this song, though, is the third verse in which the two trade intentionally ridiculous verses that turn out just ridiculously sick. These guys can’t even pretend to be whack (excluding Pooh of course).

Little Brother clearly had a problem with the music being played on the radio, so instead of complaining about it on every song (they saved that for the second album), they got together and gave us another option. The Listening is a nearly perfect collection of mood music that oozes flavor and originality. The only real downfall here is that 1/3 of the group sucks. Thankfully, Big Pooh’s taupe-ass rhymes are easily overlooked and Phonte and 9th’s talent is more than enough to make up for it. Do yourself a favor and get your groove on to this masterpiece.

Scott's #9 Pick:  Wu-Tang Clan – Wu-Tang Forever (1997)

Being holed up in a Staten Island basement with just an MPC has to get boring after a while.

RZA had a Kofax-like run during the mid-1990’s, producing the Wu-Tang Clan’s debut and five subsequent Wu-solo albums in little over three years.  With such a prolific start to his career, it was only inevitable that the chief architect of the Wu would eventually branch out and add something new to his arsenal.   Armed with a keyboard as his new weapon, RZA began work on the Wu-Tang Clan’s follow-up album, 1997’s double-disc epic Wu-Tang Forever.

Upon Forever's release, this new production approach was not initially embraced by the legions of Clan fans expecting more of the same from RZA.  And though subsequent solo albums would find the producer completely immersed in a new digital sound, Forever is more of an extension of RZA’s older work than it is a deviation.  While synths may have replaced samples on many of Forever’s songs, his trademark grit remains fully intact.  From the menacing violins on album opener “Reunited” to the ominous, low rolling organs on the dark “Duck Seazon”, RZA simply creates from scratch sounds that he would have been apt to sample in his early days.

But what really separates Forever from the Wu’s previous gems is the Clan itself.  The album finds many of the ten members at the apex of their rapping prowess.  In particular, Inspectah Deck treats the disc as a coming out party, destroying nearly every song that he touches.  “It’s only natural, actual facts are thrown at you, the impact will blow trees back and crack statues” the rapper effortlessly flows over first disc closer “It’s Yourz”.  Clan poster-boy Method Man is also at his sharpest, forgoing his usual (somewhat) playful style for a darker, more sinister approach.  The riveting “Impossible” finds both a RZA who has never rapped better and a show-stopping verse from a then-emerging Ghostface Killah. 

On top of all that, Forever also has one of hip-hop’s greatest singles, the nearly 6-minute long “Triumph”.  If the Clan’s essence could ever be encapsulated into one song, it would be this one.  The track, which features no hook and all 10 members taking turns over a rousing beat, has enough energy to make even the most modest listener bob their head.

Released amidst hip-hop’s questionable double album frenzy of the late-90’s , Forever undoubtedly contains a couple of unnecessary tracks.  However, the sheer preponderance of elite emceeing and production spread over two discs makes Wu-Tang Forever not only the Clan’s pinnacle moment, but one of hip-hop’s as well. 

If only RZA’s keyboard broke afterwards…

DOWNLOAD THE LISTENING HERE:  http://www.megaupload.com/?d=h8jpk8vp
DOWNLOAD WU-TANG FOREVER HERE: http://www.mediafire.com/?g5tjttoqmdz

Whack song of the day: "Black Shampoo"

In honor of Wu-Tang Clan's Wu-Tang Forever being named as Scott's 9th best hip-hop album ever, we'd like to remind you that it isn't a flawless record.  In fact, it contains perhaps the worst song in Wu-Tang's inconsistent discography, "Black Shampoo".



What makes the track so bad, you ask?

1. It's credited to the grittiest rap group at the time... and is named after a hair product.
2. It is a U-God solo track.  Somehow the guy who leaves every Wu track a little more stanky gets his very own song on the group's magnum-opus.
3. The fruity ass flute
4. It gives you the honor of hearing U-God take a bath
5. It has lyrics that make you think that rather giving it to your raw with no trivia, U-God is more interested in opening a Bath and Body Works franchise.  Here is some of the science he drops:

• "Massage, peppermint oil, shampoo and pears/ Cinnamin, aloe, natural for you hair"
• "Lovers, bath crystals, lovers bun scrubbers"
• "Vanilla apple heat, loop played jazz music, coffee pillow sleeps"
• "Lay on the couch, while I clip your toenails"
• "Dreams of peaches and cream steam secret spells"

We could keep going but we are starting to feel really uncomfortable...

The 10th Best Hip-Hop Album EVER MADE

Illmatic.  36 Chambers.  The Chronic.  Reasonable Doubt.  Every time we hear these few words strung together, the first thing that pops into our head is not "best hip-hop albums ever made".  Instead, it's "someone must have Googled 'best hip-hop albums ever made'".  Just because every rap fan is supposed to jock certain albums endlessly doesn't mean we have to.  Over the next few days, both of us (Ethan and Scott) will reveal our own top 10 hip-hop albums, starting off with #10.


Ethan's #10 Pick: Snoop Doggy Dogg - Doggystyle (1993)

Call me sentimental, but I get nostalgic whenever I listen to Mr. Doggy Dogg’s classic debut. Doggystyle is the first album that I can remember being really excited about even before its release. As soon as it did drop, I remember running straight to my friend’s house to dub it local record store to purchase a legal copy of it. I remember returning home and listening to it again and again in my headphones (if I played it out loud, mom would’ve taken the tape). I was spellbound by every word as a kid and even today whenever I hear that bathtub skit my balls get so wet… 

The thing that is so great about this album is the way the gritty and unrefined sounds of Snoop and his featured guests blend seamlessly with Dr. Dre’s elaborate and polished production. “Tha Shiznit” is a perfect example of this, with Snoop spitting some straight gangster shit over an instrumental that is seemingly just as gangster until those flutes come in and just smooth that thing out. It’s these little details and intricacies throughout that make the album shine. This is Dre and Snoop at their best.

Also at their best are the featured artists and friends with whom Snoop shares the album’s spotlight. After George Clinton kicks it off as only he can, rappers like Warren G (“get on your knees and then start jugglin…”), Kurupt (“if you ain’t up on thangs…”) and, to a lesser extent, Daz (“hey, Kurupt, can you help me write my verse?”) killed all the verses that they contributed. Nate Dogg sufficiently did his thing (“when I met you last night babaaaay”), establishing himself as west coast rap’s hook guy. Even the artists that didn’t experience as much personal accomplishment afterwards added their own flavor to (Mr. Malik is sick), or at least didn’t detract too much from (RBX, I’m looking at you Mr. “not pic-a-nic baskets, but pic-a-nic caskets”) the greatness of the final product. 

The themes of the album vary from gangster shit to pimp shit to… well that’s about it, but that’s ok. By keeping their focus narrow, Snoop and Dre were able to really perfect the formula. This is not at all to say that the album becomes repetitive, though. The feel of the album is as dynamic as can be. “Gin and Juice” is fun street single, “Lodi Dodi” is a chill throwback story track, “For All My Niggaz & Bitches” is hardcore lyrical gangbanging at its finest, and “Doggy Dogg World” is just funky as shit. But arguable the two most memorable songs (and my personal favorites) are “Ain’t No Fun (If The Homies Can’t Have None)” and “Murder Was The Case”. The former will have people that never listen to rap singing along with the quickness and the latter is simply put the best song Snoop has ever written.

Doggystyle represents the perfection of the new G-Funk sound created on the Chronic and the best of west coast rap, gangster rap, and 90s rap in general. Even though Snoop was never able to recapture the hunger, passion, and inventiveness displayed on this release, it doesn’t matter. In fact, that he has remained one of hip-hop’s biggest names despite a decade and a half of mediocre music is a testament to how amazing this album actually is. So enjoy this album before he literally swizzes it up by making a sequel.

Scott's #10 Pick:  Kanye West – Graduation (2007)

Kanye West has yet to deliver an album that lives up to his immense talent.  However, unlike similar criticisms levied against rappers like Ludacris and Jadakiss, this is more of a testament to the risk-taking rapper/producer’s extremely high ceiling than it is an indictment against his current cannon. 

College Dropout, West’s fine debut, was loaded with production similar to his previous work with artists like Jay-Z and Talib Kweli, and boasted guest appearances from a countless number of hip-hop’s elite. Late Registration, West's second album, began to take steps into new musical terrain, due in large part to Jon Brion's cinematic instrumentation.  However, the album sounded bloated and too large in scope at times, thanks to numerous (mildly funny) skits, unnecessarily long song outros and, sometimes, the cinematic beats themselves.

Kanye West’s third album, Graduation, is perhaps his most overlooked and underappreciated release.  It is also his best.  Some of the album’s brilliance is found merely in what it doesn’t do.  The shortcomings of his first two releases are circumvented here, as Graduation has an economical 13 tracks, no skits and only one guest rapper.  Of course, the majority of its strength lies in what the album does do.

West and his guest producers take his music in a new sonic direction, layering on melodic, lush synths over his traditional sample-based foundations.  Perhaps exemplifying this new sound best is “I Wonder”, which takes a disarming and sparse Labi Siffre sample to vibrant heights distant from anything West produced during his College Dropout days.  The album also contains West’s arguably best song, “Flashing Lights”, an electronically pulsing yet soulful collage lamenting the highs and lows of a relationship.   

Other highlights include odes to Jay-Z and his hometown, and the album ranges from a Daft Punk-powered, futuristic single to a Common-inspired, mellowed out affair.  This breadth makes Graduation’s scope seem even more expansive than Late Registration's, but instead of bloat, West's tact and sonic exploration make for a thoroughly succinct, vivacious listen.  It also signals that the best could still be yet to come from Kanye-to-the.

Don't keep your hopes up for Jadakiss, though.


DOWNLOAD DOGGYSTYLE HERE: http://www.mediafire.com/?zimmwcmuzzn
DOWNLOAD GRADUATION HERE: http://www.mediafire.com/?chbmoo1nczt

Lingo of the day: "Swizzed"

 swizz /swis/ v. 1 to mess up something

Have you ever farted at a bomb ass party?  Crashed a brand-new Lexus?  Spilled mustard on your new Afflicted t-shirt?  Bought an Afflicted t-shirt?  If so, you've swizzed before.

You may be wondering what swizzed is.  The phrase is named after the biggest un-talent in hip-hop, Swizz Beatz, and his incredible ability to mess up every piece of music he is involved in.  His beats typically suck, but on the rare occasion that he does produce something decent, he either stole it from a Casio keyboard pre-set or ends up ruining it by recording his hideous voice on the track too.  He could probably make a track suck just by silently standing in the studio while it's getting recorded.

A prime example of Swizz Beatz swizzing a song can be found on the newly-leaked "Lord Lord Lord" with Mos Def, Kanye West and Raekwon.  You'd think the song would be ruined once his horrendous verse starts, but no my friends, it's ruined within the first 15-seconds of the song - at the moment you hear his voice.

So, the next time you have swizzed something, you can at least take solace in the fact that you don't swizz everything.  Only one man is capable of doing that.